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Oh Pack It In Part 1

I love the internet. Most of the time. Some of the time I look at the screen and sigh inwardly, plotting just how quickly I can push something into the sea.

So let’s start a new regular feature. Somewhere where I can wrap all those occasions up in one tidy bow and throw them at you from my screen to yours..

First up this week:

The Allure clickbait title ‘This $8.00 ELF Moisturizer is going viral thanks to a teen’s skin-care routine’. When you read the article, and engage your brain, it’s clear that everything else that this young man uses up to the moisturiser is what is actually adjusting his skin. Acids basically. The moisturiser has jack to do with it. Zero. Nada. I’m not linking to it but it’s a nonsense. Of course the entire feature is full of affiliate links that are undisclosed.

Huda Beauty. God Bless Her. There is not a day goes by where I am not tagged on Instagram by people aghast at her skincare ‘hacks’. Whether it’s using a toothbrush on your face, or a hair clip to scrape your nose (don’t ask), I tend to ignore it for the most part. But this morning the lovely Huda raved about Zelens Power A Treatment Drops and said how much they had helped her skin/pigmentation etc, but then said that you can’t use it more than a couple of times a week because it ‘thins the skin’.

Huda love. You can’t go telling people it’s ok to brush your nose with a toothbrush but that ‘this’ product needs care. It does not thin the skin, it fortifies it. It’s brilliant. I’m glad you like it. I do too. Use it daily. Crack on.

And then let’s finish with this gem:

If you are on twitter you may have seen a little (big) furore around an article on the outline.com written by a 25 (ish) year old woman stating that ‘skincare is a con’.

The writer laments that we skincare lovers are all fools, that the skin is perfectly capable of taking care of itself and she further says on twitter that her mum only ever washes her face with water and she has perfect skin. Well that should be your first clue right there. You’ve been blessed with good genes. I’m genuinely very pleased for you. Not everyone is so lucky.
There are so many holes in her piece that if I wanted to respond to every attempt at a point she makes, I’d be here all day. But in essence, she is not happy that we are all being vain and wasting our money buying skincare because we’re not thinking of others:

‘When the world is chaos, it makes sense for society to take an introspective turn. But the skincare craze isn’t introspective per se: it’s looking into yourself but stopping at the literal outermost layer.’

Does that ‘literal outermost layer’ include getting your (beautiful) brows threaded and fake eyelashes/mascara? Coz that’s the face you’re showing to the world Krithika. Makeup isn’t vain and big business, but skincare is?

Get in the sea. And take your beautiful, young, patronising, condescending attitude and genetically-blessed, blemish-free face with you.